I was surfing with Fox News on in the background.
Here are the results.
(Profanity mostly redacted)
Shrub is live on Fox right now.
Talking to Orange County white people about immigration.
Mary Bono is there.
He’s talking about riding his bike.
Okay, just saw an old black man in a suit.
Shrub running down lists of names.
He has two thoughts:
1. The War on Terror is not over. He thinks about it all the time. He makes a lot of decisions. 9-11!!!! YES!!!!! New record!
We are denying terrorists “safe haven.” “They are bound together by an ideology that is totalitarian in nature.”
Irony!
There is a threat of WMDs if the terrorists take over Iraq. Oops, isn’t that off by a letter?
We must beat them over there so we don’t have to face them over here.
Our troops deserve the best.
Fat white man with goatee nods.
Bush believes in God.
Did he just say “Articles of Consideration?”
A Lesson of History from George Bush:
The Prime Minister of Japan is his friend. Because Japan adopted democracy. And that’s why we’re going to complete The Mission.
Okay, now here comes immigration.
“Why talk in Orange County about immigration?”
“Because that’s what a leader does.”
I think I see Denny Dillon.
We must welcome immigrants while employing really expensive stuff to keep them out. (paraphrase)
Six million people have been caught crossing the border since 2001.
So weird hearing a right-winger repeating the phrase “six-million people.”
“There are jobs Americans will not do.”
Yeah, jobs that pay less than minimum wage and give you cancer, a$$hole!
We need a guest-worker program with cards.
Isn’t this big government interfering with the “coyote” industry?
If you think there’s such a thing as a tamper-proof ID card you have never been an American teenager.
I think he got The Light.
F*ck!
He’s starting to take questions and the Foxies just cut away!
Okay, other news channels are covering other stuff. CNBC is on it.
On Iraq: “I tried to solve things diplomatically to the max.” He really said that, swear to god.
The original question was “Knowing what you know now, would you have done anything differently?”
See if you can guess the answer.
It’s Tommy Franks’ fault we didn’t have enough troops in Iraq.
J**** ****k, he’s taking questions (okay, from a screened audience) and all the news channels are doing commercials.
Tony Danza is interviewing the guy who used to play Larry on “Newhart.”
Let the mile-wide nickel-iron asteroid hit now….
